TLDR: I May Be Wrong is filled with memorable stories, but its greatest lesson is surprisingly ordinary. Learning to doubt our own opinions may be one of the most peaceful habits we can cultivate.
Note to self: The next time Wilson feels an eye-roll ready to go or is about to lash out at someone else, try repeating three times: I may be wrong.
That was the mantra a meditation teacher once gave Björn Natthiko Lindeblad, a Swedish economist who walked away from a promising career in his mid-twenties to spend the next seventeen years as a monk in the Thai forest tradition. It sounds almost too simple to work.
Indeed, it is easier said than done. But, on the few occasions when it worked for me, I noticed a gentle sense of peace coursing within.
I picked up this book after receiving multiple recommendations for it, including one from a friend who is not a Buddhist. After reading just three pages into the book, I got a glimpse of why it is so popular, even amongst those who may not be Buddhists.
The Prologue
395 words. In just 395 words, Natthiko gave the reader a taste of the following:
A succinct summary of his life journey
Just exactly what he gave up when he was a monk, and how long he did it for
The most important lesson he learnt as a monk
A cliffhanger about what was awaiting him in the last two years of his life
Reading the prologue feels like watching the first few seconds of those lightning-paced reels on TikTok or Instagram nowadays; you get all the juiciest details meant to keep you hooked. Interestingly, how Natthiko’s life unfolded may feel just as surreal and unbelievable as some of those reels with plot twists swinging at you once every 30 seconds.
The Style
38 chapters, each landing with one clear point, and some are only two pages long. Natthiko’s insights are interspersed with anecdotes from his life, with his dry humour peppered throughout the book. The conversational tone of the book makes it easy to read and I sometimes felt like I was listening to a friend sharing about his life.
The First Four Chapters
In the first chapter, Natthiko describes an experience of samādhi (meditative stillness) he had when he was eight years old. His account is reminiscent of the then-Bodhisatta’s samādhi experience under the rose-apple tree before his enlightenment as the Buddha.
The second chapter then goes into his educational journey, his ascent up the career ladder before culminating in the existential crisis he experienced at 26 years old. That was when he shared his initial encounter with meditation.
More importantly, that encounter signalled the beginning of the wisdom deep within starting to bubble at the surface.
Chapter Three eloquently describes his guidance on how to meditate, coupled with lovely metaphors that helps one to visualise how meditation could be like. The chapter comes across as authentic, honest and relatable, without feeling like one is being preached at. Instead, he invites the reader to try out meditation. He does not shy away from acknowledging the difficulties of meditation and highlights the value of that stillness that can be found within all of us.
We then witness Natthiko embark on his search for meaning after quitting in Chapter Four. It includes an encounter of him being jilted when on his eat-pray-love journey to Thailand. Strictly speaking, there was more of “eat” and “love”.
Interestingly, when the love did not work out, it prompted him to move onto “pray” instead and that signalled the start of his adventures at a monastery.
By now, I have only gone into 24 pages of the book. Natthiko is truly an expert at storytelling. His vivid descriptions and honesty at baring his heart out made it a compelling read thus far.
Life as a Monk
The book went on to explore the scale of challenges Natthiko faced living life as a monk. There were anecdotes about physical dangers encountered when living in the forest and how they served as teachings for him. He also shared about encounters with different teachers at Wah Pah Nanachat, the monastery set up by Ajahn Chah catering to an international community keen on practising Buddhism. For those familiar with the Thai forest tradition, you may recognise many familiar names in the book, including Ajahn Jayasaro, who served as the abbot of the monastery when Natthiko was there.
I found it fascinating to read about Natthiko’s journey as a monk, through his struggles with control, the power of letting go and how monastic life resembles mundane life much more than we think.
His account of the time spent in the monastery helps to paint a more realistic picture of monkhood, giving us an insider’s view of how life could be like as a monastic.
One of the most memorable parts from this section was a quote from a postcard sent by Ajahn Jayasaro to Natthiko when he was spending time in hermitage, away from the monastic community:
“It seems to me, the more refined forms of happiness are characterised by the absence of things, rather than the presence of things.”
For readers who have experienced the wisdom arising after progressively letting go more, you may resonate with Natthiko’s anecdotes and inner thoughts and that could help further strengthen your faith in the Triple Gem.
The Biggest Draw of the Book
What I enjoyed most about the book was Natthiko’s authenticity and rawness in his words, especially when it came to the deepest thoughts and darkest periods. He did not see the world in a dichotomised way, just simply framing the world in black and white. By sharing his struggles, his embarrassments and his darkest times with such honesty, I get a feeling that this person’s sense of self is probably rather diminished already.
Also, I was reminded of the book When Breath Becomes Air and wondered if the idea of impending death could cause some people to be less self-conscious and to focus on what truly matters.
Gems of Wisdom
This book contains a treasure trove of insights and given our variety of life experiences, we may relate more to certain insights. For me, the eponymous quote “I may be wrong” hits the hardest.
Contrary to Natthiko, I tend to see the world rather distinctly in terms of extremes and more often than not, it stems from a belief that my view is always right.
It was only after reading Natthiko’s account of how he gradually trusted his opinions less and how that has changed his perspective on things that I started to look out for times when I was wrong. My mind was adroit at finding reasons to deny that fact, to trivialise my mistakes and to protect my ego.
More importantly, death is a great teacher and Natthiko had clearly learnt a lot from this instructor. For those who have not encountered death in your immediate family or friends, this could be an opportunity for you to uncover some wisdom which may come in handy eventually when we meet death, either through others or when it is our turn.
In the Patoda Sutta, the Buddha compares this to four types of horses, each stirred by a different depth of the goad (a prickly stick). One moves at the sight of its shadow. Another only when struck to the bone.
For horses, a trainer uses a goad to spur a horse into motion, sometimes raised just enough to cast a shadow, sometimes pressed hard enough to break skin. For people, the Buddha names four equivalent goads: hearing that a stranger has died, seeing it with your own eyes, losing someone close to you, or finally facing your own body breaking down.
The horse that is stirred becomes resolute, and that resolve is what turns into training.
Awareness on its own changes nothing. It has to be followed by the discipline to sit with the discomfort rather than look away from it, the same discipline Natthiko spent seventeen years building in the forest.
Perhaps, we should consider which horse we are most alike to. Reading Natthiko’s account might just be enough of a shadow to get us moving, long before life delivers the harder version of the lesson. The work, though, only begins after we notice the shadow. What we do with that awareness forms the actual practice.
Conclusion
I love reading autobiographies and chatting with others to learn about their lives. I find that there is a lot to learn from the experiences of others and since it is unlikely that we will experience all there is to life, we can benefit a lot from others’ stories.
There are, however, some common threads in the stories we gather from different people and it is intriguing how sometimes a same story recounted in a different setting could touch us in a different way. Ajahn Brahm, one of my favourite teachers, appears in the closing pages of the book, in the form of an excerpt Natthiko shared from one of Ajahn Brahm’s talks on death.
So, perhaps you may want to consider reading this man’s account of his life. An account of letting go, written by a man who was, by the end, being asked to let go of everything.
Further Readings
Stillness Flowing:
A biography of Ajahn Chah, written by Ajahn Jayasaro and read by Ajahn Siripanyo. I highly recommend the audiobook version because Ajahn Siripanyo’s voice brings the story to life.
A book written by Ajahn Jayasaro in a question-and-answer format, shedding light on common questions about Buddhism. I loved how Ajahn Jayasaro struck a fine balance between capturing the essence of the Buddhist teachings while keeping the words interesting and not overly technical in nature.
In this episode of the Handful of Leaves podcast, hosts Cheryl and Angela sit down together for the first time since attending a March meditation retreat led by Ajahn Jayasaro, to unpack what the experience taught them once they brought it back into ordinary life. Both arrived quietly depleted — Angela nursing work burnout, Cheryl anxious and adrift after a company restructuring — and what follows is a candid conversation about what happened when they sat with that depletion instead of running from it.
Angela describes the central shift: meditation isn’t about arriving at a peaceful feeling, but about learning to observe whatever feeling is actually present, including grief over her mother’s recent passing. Cheryl admits her own retreat was “quite horrible” until she realized, on the very last day, that her craving for peace was itself the obstacle. From there, the conversation moves through doomscrolling, “not good enough” narratives, and the habit of comparing themselves to others — reframed not as personal failings but as patterns that can be noticed and gently changed.
By the end, both hosts land somewhere unexpected — not on having achieved permanent calm, but on having built a little more patience, and a little more trust that discomfort can be sat with rather than escaped. The retreat held real suffering, they agree, but also real joy.
About the Speaker
🧘 Ajahn Jayasaro is a British-born monk of the Thai Forest Tradition and one of its most widely respected living teachers. Born Shaun Michael Chiverton on the Isle of Wight in 1958, he first joined Ajahn Sumedho’s monastic community in the UK in 1978 before travelling to Thailand the following year to train under the renowned meditation master Ajahn Chah (Luang Por Chah) at Wat Nong Pah Pong. He received novice ordination in 1979 and higher ordination in 1980.
From 1997 to 2002, Ajahn Jayasaro served as abbot of Wat Pah Nanachat, the international forest monastery founded by Ajahn Chah, guiding monastics from around the world under the tradition’s strict standards of discipline and meditation. He is also widely recognized as Ajahn Chah’s official biographer, having spent over twenty years researching and writing Stillness Flowing, the definitive 800-page account of his teacher’s life and teachings.
Since 2003, Ajahn Jayasaro has lived in a hermitage near Khao Yai National Park in Thailand. Over more than four decades of practice, he has become one of the most respected contemporary voices of the Thai Forest Tradition, known internationally for his meditation retreats, talks, and writing. https://www.jayasaro.panyaprateep.org/en/about-us
Key Takeaways
🌊 “This wanting is not getting me anywhere.”
Craving peace can itself be the thing standing between you and peace — the retreat’s hardest lesson for Cheryl was learning to stop chasing a feeling and start simply observing what was there.
🪞 We are a function of who we compare ourselves to.
Both superiority and inferiority are forms of conceit; the fix isn’t to stop comparing yourself to others, but to choose a wholesome idol — someone whose compassion and skill you want to grow into, not just their achievements.
🔁 It’s actually just a habit — and a habit that can be stopped.
From doomscrolling to a nagging “I’m not good enough,” the patterns that feel like personality flaws are really just loops with a trigger and a reward, which means they can be noticed, named, and gradually reshaped.
Special thanks to our sponsors:
Buddhist Youth Network, Lim Soon Kiat, Alvin Chan, Tan Key Seng, Soh Hwee Hoon, Geraldine Tay, Venerable You Guang, Wilson Ng, Diga, Joyce, Tan Jia Yee, Joanne, Suñña, Shuo Mei, Arif, Bernice, Wee Teck, Andrew Yam, Kan Rong Hui, Wei Li Quek, Shirley Shen, Ezra, Joanne Chan, Hsien Li Siaw, Gillian Ang, Wang Shiow Mei, Ong Chye Chye, Melvin, Yoke Kuen, Nai Kai Lee, Amelia Toh, Hannah Law, Shin Hui Chong, Dennis Lee, Kayliam, Darren
TLDR: Most of us don’t realise how restless our minds are until we step away from everyday busyness. Through meditation, sutta study, and honest reflection, DAYWA retreats offer young adults a rare space to slow down, deepen their practice, and reconnect with what truly matters.
Editor’s note: This article was kindly contributed by Fang Huey, Johnson, Hong Jiayi, and Tan Pei Shan
Most of us don’t realise how loud our minds are until we finally get space from our day-to-day tasks.
Once or twice a year, DAYWA (Dhamma Assembly of Young Working Adults) organises a retreat for young Buddhist adults who want to do exactly that: step away, slow down, and spend a few days actually practising the Dhamma rather than just reading about it.
This is what that looks like in practice.
The retreat is designed to provide a peaceful and conducive environment to learn and contemplate on the teachings of the Buddha. They are also able to pressure-test their understanding through exchanges and in-depth interviews with other participants.
How Your Starting Journey Looks Like
Mornings begin with meditation. Then sutta study with Sis Sylvia Bay, who has a way of making centuries-old teachings feel immediately relevant to the kind of life a working adult in Singapore actually lives. Afternoons are for personal practice, sitting or walking, at whatever pace suits you. There are group and individual interviews with teachers, where you can bring your actual questions, the ones you didn’t know you had until you were sitting quietly long enough to notice them.
Evenings close with puja, Q&A, and sharing of merits.
It sounds simple. It is, and that’s the point.
There is only one DAYWA retreat in 2026. If you’ve been thinking about going, this is the one.
Sample schedule (subject to changes)
06:30 AM
Group guided meditation / Self-practice
07:30 AM
Breakfast
08:30 AM
Sutta study
11:45 AM
Lunch (Noble Silence) & Rest
01:30 PM
Sutta studyGroup interviews / Self Practice*
05:30 PM
Rest / Tea break / Dinner (optional)
07:00 PM
Evening pujaQ&ASharing of merits
09:00 PM
Rest / Self-practice
A Supportive Space for Learning and Practice
Designed for both beginners and experienced practitioners, the retreat provides a supportive environment for participants to deepen their understanding of the Dhamma and cultivate their practice at their own pace.
Sutta Study
Each morning begins with sutta study led by Sis Sylvia Bay. Through clear explanations and relatable examples, she breaks down Buddhist concepts and terminology in a way that is easy to understand, even for those who are new to Buddhism.
What stood out to me was how relevant the teachings are to our daily lives, and how the discussions helped bridge the gap between learning the Dhamma and applying it in practice. Participants also engage in small group discussions, providing an opportunity to hear different perspectives and learn from one another’s experiences.
Self-practice: Sitting and Walking Meditation
Throughout the retreat, participants are given time for their own practice, where they can choose between sitting and walking meditation. Experienced meditators may choose to undertake longer meditation sessions, while those newer to practice can adjust the duration into shorter sessions according to their comfort level. I initially felt intimidated by the thought of spending long hours meditating, but appreciated the flexibility to practise.
Interviews with Teachers
Another unique aspect of the retreat is the opportunity for both group and individual interviews. These sessions allow participants to seek clarification on meditation experiences, Dhamma concepts, or challenges encountered during practice. Beyond having our questions answered, it is insightful to hear the experiences and perspectives of fellow retreatants.
One aspect I particularly appreciated was the opportunity to step away from the busyness of everyday life. Without the usual distractions and demands, the retreat created space to simply slow down, be present, and reconnect with the Dhamma and our own minds.
Our Key Takeaways From Past Retreats
Reflection as organising team members DAYWA Retreat Sept 2025 (Hong Jiayi):
Serving on a retreat is its own kind of practice. Even while organising, the worry and the planning mind don’t switch off. Should I let people talk to the teachers now, or hold back? And that’s exactly the point.
It becomes a safe space to practice, to watch the defilements arise and then watch them wash away. The first time I ever joined a retreat was with DAYWA, and this time, I’m serving with the people who make it happen. Back then, everything felt like “wow, so inspiring.” Now I’m more often the bad cop, seeing the behind-the-scenes of holding both the retreatants’ experience and the teachers’ energy. What surprised me was a new kind of joy in watching other people learn and grow. It’s empowering, and I’d encourage anyone to try serving for themselves.
This time, I’m also practising alongside everyone, and there’s always something new to learn, even though it’s the same Four Noble Truths we’ve heard before. Revision is its own gift, a reminder of the wisdom you already hold but keep forgetting. The one-on-ones, especially, where the advice is tailored to exactly where you are. When we leave this place and go back to our lives, the peacefulness will probably fade, and the old defilements will resurface — that’s normal. But the sutta we learnt reminds us not to give up. Just keep showing up. You’ll feel better after that.
Reflection as a participant (Pei Shan):
My first Buddhist retreat was with DAYWA in August 2024, and I felt really grateful as that retreat kick-started my meditation journey. When I attended the September 2025 retreat, I decided to ask my sister along.
Here are some doodles I drew to consolidate my reflections.
Samadhi arises when the mind is joyous
During the retreat, some of us would wake up at 5 am to run around the retreat centre. A resident dog would often join us and run happily alongside us. Somehow, it made the run more joyful, even though waking up early to run can feel arduous. It reminded me of Sister Sylvia’s teaching that samadhi arises when the mind is joyful.
I noticed that when my mind is light and peaceful, stillness arises more naturally as compared to when my mind is caught in sloth and torpor or restlessness. This is similar to running: when I approach the run with gratitude and a joyful heart, there’s a sense of ease and flow. Yet when my mind is tired or caught up in unwholesome states, every step feels heavier.
Joy is not merely the result of stillness, but one of the conditions that allows stillness to arise. Like the happy dog that accompanied us on our morning runs, joy may be the quiet companion that guides us along the path towards samadhi.
Grow at your own pace
In my practice, I noticed my tendency to want to let go of suffering quickly. In the beginning, I felt slightly frustrated when I didn’t have a “good sit,” or when unwholesome states arose.
One day, during walking meditation, I noticed a plant with leaves of different shades- light green, yellow, orange, and red. Each leaf was unique, expressing its own stage of growth.
I recalled a participant asking Brother Chye a question about feeling frustrated with our meditation practice. His response was simple but powerful: we can tell ourselves “well done” after every sit, because every sit is a good sit when effort has been put in.
Together, these experiences shifted my perspective. Just like the leaves, everyone has different conditions and grows at their own pace. We don’t need to hold the expectation of becoming a “meditation guru” after one retreat, or compare ourselves with others. Instead, we can gently release expectations and rejoice in our own effort and the sincerity we bring to each sit.
Enjoy the beauty, but don’t cling to it
I’ve always loved nature, and being surrounded by it during the retreat felt deeply restful and nourishing. At the same time, one of the key teachings we learned was the Second Noble Truth — that suffering arises from craving. This led me to wonder: Is it wrong to love and enjoy nature?
During one of the sharings, I heard a perspective that stayed with me: it is perfectly fine to enjoy the beauty of nature, but we are encouraged to be mindful not to cling to it. This applies not only to nature, but to all aspects of life: our loved ones, our careers, and what we cherish. We can learn to fully appreciate these experiences while gently letting go of our attachment.
Looking Ahead: 2026Batam Retreat
We warmly welcome young working adults (ages 20–39) to join us for Opening the Heart: A Brahmavihāras Retreat, a 5D4N retreat centred on the cultivation of loving-kindness (mettā), compassion (karuṇā), appreciative joy (muditā), and equanimity (upekkhā).
Participants will deepen their understanding of these Four Immeasurables and explore how to bring them into daily life. Whether you are new to meditation or an experienced practitioner, all are welcome.
The retreat will take place from 12–16 September 2026 in Batam, Indonesia, and will be the only DAYWA retreat held in 2026.
Retreat Details:
Dates: 12–16 September 2026
Location: Batam, Indonesia
Leave Required: 3 days
Registration Closing Date: 31 July 2026
Fees:
Twin Sharing: $380
Single Room: $500
All prices include ferry, accommodation, breakfast, and lunch.
Caveat: This is based on personal learnings and I seek forgiveness for any errors and omissions.
Jetavana, one of Buddha’s most frequented residences and where many teachings were given
Why go on a Buddhist pilgrimage
A Buddhist pilgrimage to the 4 holy sites can be a catalyst or accelerant for practice. It is an experiential contemplation of the Buddha’s life and teaching.
It is an opportunity for us to put time and effort into contemplating and understanding for ourselves what the Buddha was trying to teach and gain clarity on how we want to conduct ourselves in daily life through our body, speech and mind.
Going on a pilgrimage is skillful when it strengthens Saddhā (confidence in the Buddha and his teachings as a way to end suffering), inspires Sila (our virtue and commitment to be good) and Bhāvanā (refers to meditation that purifies the mind of unwholesome mental states that tie us to samsara). It gives us a sense of urgency towards spiritual practice.
It is only life changing if you choose to change how you wish to live your life before, during and after a pilgrimage.
Mahabodhi Temple, Bodhgaya, the place where Buddha attained enlightenment
When to go on a Buddhist pilgrimage
Peak pilgrimage season is during the winter months of October to March when the weather is cool and dry.
How to go on a Buddhist pilgrimage
Set a clear, wholesome purpose. For example: My intention for this upcoming pilgrimage is to reinforce my refuge in Buddha, Dhamma, Sangha; cultivate virtue and insight; dedicate merit to all beings.
Once you set your intention, have a think about how you would like to align your intention with your behavior, speech and mind at least during the pilgrimage.
Perhaps you would like to make an effort to keep 5 or 8 precepts. 8 precepts are to support renunciation/restraint of sensuous stimulation to create better conditions for a peaceful mind.
Or perhaps you would prefer to put more effort and intention to soften your heart throughout the trip with the 4 brahmaviharas:
– Metta: wish safety and peace to all you meet.
– Karuna: be patient with crowds, discomfort, and others’ needs.
– Mudita: rejoice in others’ devotion and practice.
– Upekkha: meet delays, heat, cold, or disappointment with balance.
It would be good to have a beginner’s humility: arrive not to “collect” places but to be taught by them.
How to prepare for a Buddhist pilgrimage
Prepare the body
If you don’t already have a somewhat consistent meditation practice, it would be good to try getting used to the act of meditating. Try different forms of meditation so that you will have a toolbox you can reach into while you are on pilgrimage – be it metta, breath, walking meditation. This is something you can and should do while on pilgrimage. What better way to honour Buddha than practising what he taught while visiting the holy sites.
One of the many benefits of metta meditation is that one would be dear to animals.
On a practical level, one should take supplements to boost your immunity before the trip. You will be exposed to different environmental conditions so it’s good to make sure your body is as healthy as can be. It would also be a good idea to stock up on medication so that you can manage whatever illnesses/symptoms that crop up.
Prepare the mind
It would be good to understand the significance of the holy sites that you would be visiting. Ideally, do some research on the holy sites you are going to visit.
Many suttas begin with “So I have heard. On one occasion the Blessed One was dwelling at Savatthi in Jeta’s Grove, Anathapiṇḍika’s Park…”. Knowing the places and the suttas that were taught at these places really makes the suttas come alive.
I chanted the Dhammacakkappavattanasutta almost daily for a month leading up to the pilgrimage.
This allowed me to chant and reflect on the significance of what occurred at Sarnath. The place where Buddha set the wheel of Dhamma in motion. Without Buddha and his teachings, we would wander endlessly in Samsara (endless cycles of rebirth).
Destined to be born, grow old, get sick and die again and again. It is the place and moment where Buddha taught the Dhamma and a third party (Koṇḍañña, one of Buddha’s first 5 disciples) was able to realise the truth of the Dhamma and find the way out of Samsara. Let the significance of that sink in while you are at Sarnath.
What to expect while on pilgrimage
Happy DAYWA pilgrims with one of our wonderful guides and trip photographer, Champ
Expect the pilgrimage to be an extreme form of practice. Think of it like signing up for a marathon when you’ve never gone for a jog longer than 5km before. So to make this whole endeavor more productive, we’d better do some training beforehand.
A pilgrimage in India is likely to be a very different experience from our daily life. We will see, smell, hear a lot of things that we are not used to. It is a good time to practice awareness that the world and the people in it move and change in their own way and in their own time. Expecting or wanting them to behave in ways we prefer is what causes us suffering. Bring these learnings home.
Mindfulness is your friend. Just observe and note everything around you without judging — I like this, I don’t like that. This should’ve been done; that shouldn’t be done. Naturally, you will be exposed to a lot of pleasant, unpleasant and neutral stimuli. This is to be expected if you live in this world.
On a practical level, you can expect roads to be a bit bumpy/jammed, toileting situations that would not be ideal and beggars that may be waiting at the bus and could follow you all the way to the entrance of the holy site. As good as your intention may be to give out some cash, please do not whip out a wad of cash that may cause you to be mobbed.
You may try to hand out tips and snacks to beggars discreetly (usually when they’re alone). Or you could look for a reputable charitable institution doing good work in the area and make a donation there as a way to support the community.
What mental qualities to develop before, during (and most importantly, continuously after) a Buddhist pilgrimage?
Daily life can be repetitive and fast moving. Because of this, we may repeat the same mistakes again and again without taking the time to reflect on which behaviours we want to let go of and which we want to encourage. Many of us live life on autopilot, without really pausing to reflect on what we do and why we do it. Pilgrimage offers a change of pace and a chance to notice the thought patterns, behaviours, and habits we have become used to for better or for worse. Pause, and reflect: what kind of adjustments do we want to make to our lives.
Pilgrimage offers a helpful shift in pace. It is often guided by a wise teacher whom you can seek counsel from. And you’ll have plenty of time with well-practiced spiritual friends who can share their experiences and offer a Dhammic perspective.
For example, do you notice any “me first” habits that cause the heart and mind to become constricted? Perhaps the tendency to become impatient with others when they seem to be “in your way.” Is this how you want to live the rest of your life? Or is there another way to relate to the world around you that would lead to less unhappiness? Do you notice any unhelpful mental narratives running quietly in the background of your mind? What stories do we tell ourselves that assume the world should be a certain way, or should treat us the way we want it to? Does it? We often compare ourselves with those around us: better, the same, or worse. What does that do to our mind and how we treat others?
When we begin to notice these habits, the next question naturally arises. If we want to cultivate a mind that is more open, steady and at ease, what qualities should we encourage? The Buddhist tradition offers a helpful framework in the form of the Ten Pāramīs, noble qualities that gradually train the mind towards generosity, wisdom and compassion. They can serve as a practical guide or “gold standard” that we return to when we are unsure how to respond to challenging situations.
If one does not know where to start, one could try to cultivate the Ten Pāramī to gently bring the mind, speech and actions back to wholesome states again and again while on pilgrimage.
The aim isn’t to beat ourselves up for not being perfect. The aim is to continuously build new patterns that eventually become our habitual response in any given circumstance.
Dana (Generosity):
Generosity begins with letting go of subtle forms of greed and ill will. This might be as simple as allowing someone else to board the bus first even when you are tired and feeling overheated, or choosing not to respond harshly when someone invades your personal space. Each small act of generosity softens the heart.
Sila (Virtue):
Sīla is the foundation that supports all the other qualities. It involves mindfulness in speech, action, and livelihood. On pilgrimage, virtue may be tested through frustration, gossip, or impatience. Upholding Sīla keeps the mind clear and free from regret.
Nekkhamma (Renunciation):
Renunciation does not mean deprivation but a willingness to release selfish desires. It is the choice to step back from constantly seeking comfort, praise, or control. On pilgrimage, Nekkhamma might appear as accepting simpler meals, basic accommodation, or an unexpected change of schedule without resentment.
Panna (Wisdom):
By stepping away from your usual routine, you may have more space to develop wisdom through reflection and observation. We begin to see more clearly which actions lead to peace and which lead to agitation. This understanding grows from direct experience rather than intellectual knowledge.
Viriya (Energy):
This is the effort to keep practising even when familiar habits pull us back into distraction or complacency. Feeling frustrated? Notice how complaining, whether internally or to others, darkens the mind. Feeling uncomfortable? It can be a good opportunity to observe how quickly we try to escape discomfort through temporary distractions such as checking our phone. You might experiment with restraining urges to shop, scroll, or daydream about food back home. Viriya is the quiet determination to return again and again to mindfulness, kindness, and clarity.
Khanti (Patience):
The qualities listed above can seem almost impossible to cultivate at times. This is where patience and forbearance become important. Khanti is the willingness to forgive yourself and try again and again, patiently finding ways to keep the mind clear and wholesome in a sustainable way.
Sacca (Truthfulness):
Honesty and integrity with yourself help you explore where your discomfort is really coming from. It is common to focus on things in the outer world that appear to be causing our suffering. Sacca gently turns our attention inward to understand what is actually giving rise to our unhappiness and how we might respond more wisely.
Adhitthana (Determination):
Determination is the quiet resolve to stay aligned with what you know to be wholesome. Pilgrimage can bring tiredness, discomfort, or moments where old habits resurface. Adhiṭṭhāna is the steady commitment to continue cultivating generosity, patience, and mindfulness even when it feels inconvenient. It is not a rigid stubbornness, but a calm decision to keep walking the path.
Metta (Loving kindness):
Loving kindness is the wish for oneself and others to be well and free from suffering. During pilgrimage you will encounter many different personalities, including those who may move more slowly than you would like, speak loudly, or behave in ways that trigger irritation. These moments can become opportunities to soften the heart and extend goodwill instead of resentment. Even silently wishing others well can gently shift the state of the mind.
Upekkha (Equanimity):
Equanimity is the ability to remain balanced in the face of pleasant and unpleasant experiences. Pilgrimage will bring moments of joy, inspiration, fatigue, and inconvenience. Upekkhā reminds us that these experiences arise and pass according to causes and conditions. By learning not to cling too tightly to pleasant moments or resist unpleasant ones, the mind becomes more steady and peaceful.
It may seem like a tall order to develop all these qualities at once, especially under unfamiliar or challenging circumstances. Instead, you might set small and achievable intentions each morning to keep in mind throughout the day. For example, “May I open my heart to opportunities to be generous with others today.”
Remember not to be too hard on yourself if you slip up. Slip ups are simply data points to reflect on. Rather than avoiding or judging them, we can learn from them and try again with a little more understanding the next time.
And most importantly, remember to carry these learnings back home and continue incorporating these positive changes into your daily life.
Suggested simple routine at a holy site
Arrival: three bows; short recollection of the Buddha.
Chanting (if that’s something you enjoy and if it helps to calm the mind)Sit 20 to 30 minutes (longer if you have the time)Walk circumambulation (honouring the triple gem with our bodies by walking around a holy site), clockwise, mindfully (three rounds)Make an offering, resolve one wholesome change you will carry home
Dedicate merit: “May all beings be happy; may this goodness support liberation for all.”
Make any spiritual aspirations you may have before you leave
Offerings you can make on pilgrimage
The greatest offering you can make to the Buddha would be paṭipattipūjā — an offering of practice.
In the Mahāparinibbāna Sutta, when people were worried about how to honour the Buddha after his passing, he made it plain that those who practise the Dhamma, who live in accordance with it, are the ones who truly honour and revere the Tathāgata. Not by ritual alone, but by transforming greed, hatred, and delusion in their own hearts.
What this means on pilgrimage is simple, but not easy. Bowing at Bodhgaya matters. Circumambulating stupas matters. Chanting matters.
But the deepest offering you can make at these places is restraint when irritation arises, kindness when fatigue sets in, mindfulness when the mind wants comfort, and patience when things do not go your way.
If you return home unchanged, the offering was mostly symbolic. If you return with even a small shift in how you speak, act, or relate to suffering, then the pilgrimage has already borne fruit.
Nevertheless, please offer flowers, candles, incense and robes as and when the opportunity arises at the holy site to brighten the mind and gladden the heart.
We had the beautiful opportunity to offer flowers at Buddha’s kuti at Jetavana as a group.
Things to bring (amongst the regular things you bring on holiday)
Remember, temperature can be subjective. It is a good idea to err on the side of caution and pack clothing you can layer
Bring basic medication. This includes painkillers, diarrhoea medication, rehydration salts, flu medicine, and anything you regularly take. Pharmacies are not easily accessible near some holy sites, they may also not carry the medication you require.
Bring mosquito repellent and itch relief cream. Mosquitoes can be persistent, especially in the evenings, and bites can become infected if scratched repeatedly.
Bring sunscreen, a hat, umbrella, and light long-sleeved clothing. The UV exposure is intense, even on cooler days, and prolonged exposure to the sun will sap your energy quickly.
Bring wet wipes, hand sanitiser, and tissues. Toileting conditions may be basic, and having your own supplies makes a significant difference to comfort and hygiene.
Bring comfortable footwear with good grip. You will be on your feet far more than you expect, often on uneven or dusty ground. You may have to take off your footwear at some of the holy sites so sturdy sandals may make sense.
Bring your meditation gear and perhaps a Dhamma book or two.
Pilgrims tend to wear comfortable & modest white tops and dark pants.
Things to take note of
Do not underestimate the physical conditions. Heat, cold, dust, long walks, and uneven terrain will wear you down quickly if you assume you can “power through”. Overconfidence usually leads to sickness halfway through the trip.
Do not drink tap water or consume unsealed drinks, even if locals do. Stick to bottled water and check that the seal is intact. Avoid ice, full stop.
Do not eat raw or unpeeled fruits and vegetables. As tempting as fresh fruit may look, food poisoning can derail the entire pilgrimage. Understand you may need your fiber, so banana or mandarins that you can peel yourself would be a reasonable choice. Choose hot, freshly cooked food whenever possible.
Do not carry large amounts of cash in one place or take it out openly. Crowded areas attract attention. Use small denominations and keep money distributed across different pockets or bags.
Do not skip rest or ignore early signs of illness. A sore throat, stomach discomfort, or fever should be addressed early with medication and hydration. Pushing on stubbornly often leads to days lost to recovery.
After returning
Integrate one concrete habit: daily morning sitting, weekly 8 precepts, regular acts of generosity. Let the pilgrimage change your life, not just your photo album.
Recommit and align your life to the Dhamma as a lay practitioner
Find a community near you that can support your practice
Recollect often moments during the pilgrimage that were wholesome and brought joy. Let these memories skilfully brighten the mind and motivate you to keep practicing
Conclusion
A pilgrimage does not awaken us by itself. It simply places us in conditions where practice becomes unavoidable.
If you walk these holy sites with intention, care, and humility, the journey continues long after you return home.
What matters most is not where you went, but how you now choose to live. May you grow in wisdom on your journey.
TLDR: A lay meditation practitioner brings a Jataka tale to life through the creation of a comic, guided by the Buddha’s teachings. In doing so, the process reframes the author’s understanding of suffering and its place in the modern world.
“Better than a thousand verses comprising useless words, is one beneficial single line, by hearing which one is pacified.”
– The Dhammapada, Translated by Venerable Narada Thera
A Time of Awakening
Sitting with eyes closed in a dark meditation hall, I listened to my teacher’s voice chanting and explaining the Anapanasati Sutta, the authoritative teaching on using the breath as an initial focus for meditation.
I felt transported to the time of the Buddha. Gradually, as I began my meditation practice, I gained a vivid understanding of the Buddhist period within Indian history, a significance I had not experienced before. So this was the Buddha’s teaching! These were its effects on the land and the people!
The practice of Anapanasati, followed by Vipassana (insight meditation), was eye-opening. Over the years, as I continued my meditation practice, the Lord Buddha’s life and the constellation of beings around him became familiar companions. They guided me; they inspired me, and they became a wholesome presence in my mind. Episodes from the Buddha’s life inspire practitioners as much as his parables. Against this backdrop, the colour and energy of the Jataka tales sprang forth.
What were once amusing cartoons in my childhood became teachings that came alive with pulsating incidents. In that light, I recalled the Lord Buddha’s previous lives when he triumphed over the most harrowing circumstances. Meditation practice truly makes the teachings of the Buddha more vivid.
A New Journey
One day, I brought the sensibilities of my filmmaking career into the creation of a comic book, as a whimsical departure from my well-trodden path. Thus, I began a new journey.
I selected the Jataka tale (ancient Buddhist stories that recount Gautama Buddha’s past lives) Mahasilava. It is about the time Lord Buddha was born as King Mahasilava, who pledged never to take a life. However, the King lost his kingdom after being betrayed by one of his ministers. Nevertheless, heheld fast to his noble intention and faced the most dangerous circumstances.
My initial reading of the story, some years earlier, had left an impression of tremendous tension and stress. This was nothing short of King Mahasilava’s painful story of endurance.
When I set out to create the comic, author and comic book artist Anupam Arunachalam introduced me to Harsho Mohan Chattoraj, one of India’s most prolific illustrators in the field. Having this fortunate encounter with Harsho, I decided to involve him in my project.
Harsho specialised in what would be considered in Buddhist parlance as the realms of hungry ghosts. Initially, we interacted through a scribbled draft of the entire comic.
Scribbled thumbnails by the writer
The Process
Months of virtual conversations unfolded between Harsho and me. Throughout the whole process, we met in person only twice. The pages trickled into life intentionally and gradually.
Mahasilava comic panel. The King contemplates his vow.
We collaborated panel by panel, line by line. Harsho illustrated far more than he had intended to. Mahasilava’s world started taking form. I suggested imagery from archaeological sites like Ajanta and artefacts from Gandhara and Pala. “As long as it was Buddhist,” I thought. The eclectic references somehow harmonised.
Mahasilava Comic panels
Throughout the creation process, I took up sketching for the main purpose of communicating with Harsho. Along with my daily dose of meditation, I added another hour to practice drawing. I drew with a meditative approach: focusing solely on the act of moving my pencil across the paper.
In another way, sketching trained me to observe. As the comic progressed painstakingly, my scribbles formed drawings over time, and I even had a go at experimenting with colours.
My watercolour suggestion and Harsho’s final panel below
Harsho considered my inputs with utmost seriousness. Preserving his individuality, he arrived at unexpected results that rendered King Mahasilava’s story with striking vividness. Finally, we completed the comic!
The Cover
During our collaboration, Harsho had visited Abu Dhabi, where he saw a Gandhara statue of the Bodhisattva. Since then, Harsho had the idea of designing a cover image based on the statue. When he finally created a cover, it was an image of Mahasilava presented as a sculpture, preserved for timeless posterity.
Cover of the MAHASILAVA Comic
Final Thoughts
The comic turned out differently than I expected. The story emerged with a raw edge, in which a reader commented that some parts were too violent and gruesome. But hey, I chose to stay true to the Theravada text. (Spoiler alert!) When the story progresses to a charnel ground with hungry jackals and corpse-feeding Yakkhas (powerful nature spirits in the Buddhist Cosmology), there is no way of softening the blow of reality.
Turning to today’s entertainment industry, a question arises. How literal and unflinching has entertainment media become? How much do audiences, including younger ones, stomach these days? The eventual question is, to what end are we consuming? Such images and stories shape the mind towards desire and aversion, strengthening the ignorance that clouds our understanding of suffering and impermanence. Few people pause to see this influence clearly.
By contrast, the Jataka tales resolve very differently. They do so peacefully, leading most viewers from suffering to a place beyond suffering. Stories from the Buddha’s past lives imbue the reader with peace and wisdom.
Once exposed to these stories, readers and audiences may be inspired to navigate emotions, reach a state of equanimity and understand impermanence. This was the Dhamma direction from which I developed the comic Mahasilava. I hope this interpretation of the Buddha’s past life as King Mahasilava brings peace and happiness for all beings.
Wise Steps
Read translations of the Jataka Tales in their original form from the Theravada Canon. Each story contains particular teachings of the Lord Buddha, which are relevant to the everyday practise of the Dhamma.
Be mindful of consuming entertainment, which may perpetuate one’s greed, aversion and delusion.
MAHASILAVA is a 24-page comic written by Rajat Ghose and illustrated by Harsho Mohan Chattoraj. It is currently available on Amazon Kindle in the US, UK, France, Italy, Germany, Netherlands, Japan, Brazil, Mexico, Canada, Australia and India.
All text and images of MAHASILAVA Comic by Rajat Ghose illustrated by Harsho Mohan Chattoraj are Copyright Rajat Ghose 2025
