Wholesome Wednesdays (WW): Bringing you curated positive content on Wednesdays to uplift your hump day.
Be humble. Don’t claim credit. Heard this at work or during projects? How often do we undermine ourselves at work and amongst friends? Here are two stories today to help you take credit when it is due and how to remove hesistance
1. I don’t deserve it, other people do much more.
2. Interrupting your what ifs
I don’t deserve it, other people do much more.
Cr: Unsplash
What’s going on here & Why we like it
Ajahn Brahm, a famous Buddhist monk, shares his personal experience of refuting praise as a norm and his further reflections on it. We have time-stamped the segment on this talk for those busy folks! In Asian societies, taking credit can be frowned upon and we sometimes feel devalued. Ajahn Brahm reminds us to celebrate our wins and have a little fun
“I was saying no. I don’t deserve it, other people do much more than me….I realised I deserved that and that changed me. I started to realise how often we refuse praise and how wonderful it is when we accept praise”
Wise Steps
Taking in praise enables us to strive harder and be worthy of future praises. Take in the little wins of life that makes you smile!
Mel Robbins, a famous podcaster, shares how we can overcome resistance and a ruminating mind that keeps playing through our what-ifs. We like it because we are often paralysed by the prospect of failures and do not see the possibilities. Comfort can become a place that holds us back from reaching out towards a brighter and happier life.
“What if it all works out? What if this turns out to be the hardest thing I do but the best decision I’ve made.”
Wise Steps
When was the last time you placed a bet on yourself and not what others said? Try Mel’s technique of replacing the critic within with something more supportive.
TLDR: How often do our looks influence our self-perception? With social media becoming increasingly consumed, how does that shape our self worth? Nana reflects on her eyebrows and the Dhamma.
I do not know about you, but I have minimal eyebrows.
They are so light that it almost appears like I have none.
Eyebrow tattoos?
At work, my colleagues would constantly tease me about them, and advise me to get an eyebrow tattoo. They often discuss beauty-enhancing measures, such as botox, fat burning, nose jobs, and the list goes on.
On one occasion, I shared about this work environment with a good friend, and she reminded me to be mindful because I could get swept away by the constant association.
I secretly thought it was ludicrous; my Dhamma roots are strong and going! I will not be swayed by such comments that people make.
Eyelid stickers and the creeping vanity
Recently I learnt about eyelid stickers, which really helped me look prettier (in my humble opinion), and they became my daily use.
Not long later, as I was waiting at the MRT station I caught myself searching up eye surgeries for double eyelids! I even began noticing the fine lines across my forehead and debated the use of botox to preserve my youth.
This was something that has never crossed my mind before, not in all my 29 years of life. Yet here I was, trying to find a way to beautify myself and prolong it.
I became self-conscious of each facial imperfection which never bothered me before.
To stop me from giving in to these desires, I began observing those who are old; and I have yet to find an 80-year-old person who retains her youthful looks.
What I came to realise is, that no matter what products we apply to our faces, or the beauty enhancement procedures we undergo, physical beauty will inevitably fade.
This experience reminded me of two things the Buddha has taught:
1. Associate not with the fools, but with the wise. Who we associate with, is also what our mind associates with. This affects us in a wholesome, or unwholesome manner.
2. Constantly bring to mind, the five daily reflections; one of which is “I am subject to aging.”
After this realisation, my colleagues who talk about beauty products no longer stir my mind to seek beauty. I, instead, try to focus on building my inner beauty. To be unshaken by praise, blame, fame, disrepute, gain, loss, happiness, and sadness.
Wise Steps:
Reflect on the people you mix with for they can affect the way you view yourself
Recollecting on impermanence and ageing is a great way to overcome unhealthy obsessions with beauty
