TLDR: Most couples do not drift apart in one suddent moment. This retreat helps couples notice the small habits that create distance and replace them with care.
Most couples do not fall out of love in ‘one sudden moment’. It happens in smaller ways.
A conversation cut short after work. A frustration left unnamed. The same argument returning with different words.
One day, two people who once felt close find themselves sharing a home and wondering where the distance came from. This is not a crisis unique to difficult marriages. It happens in good ones too. Sis Siew Fong (a practising matrimonial lawyer) would know as she has seen many couples seek her counsel in the twilight days of their marriage, and most often it is too late.
Love as practice, not just feeling
In the Dhamma, love is not treated as something that either exists or disappears. Metta, or loving-kindness, is a quality to be cultivated. It grows through attention, intention, and repeated effort, the way any skill deepens over time.
This changes how we see a struggling relationship. A couple that argues is not necessarily a couple that has failed. They may simply be two people who are still learning how to meet each other well.
What happened last year
Last year, a group of Buddhist couples spent two days together at a retreat organised by Singapore Buddhist Mission and Buddhist Library. Some were married. Some were engaged. Some were still dating.
What they shared was a sincere wish to build something lasting, and the humility to keep learning.
The retreat was led by Sis Foo Siew Fong, a practising lawyer and lay Dhamma teacher who gives talks at Uttamayanmuni Buddhist Temple, Bandar Utama Buddhist Society, and Singapore Buddhist Mission. She holds a Post Graduate Diploma in Buddhist Studies and a Master of Arts in Buddhism.
Her sessions drew on both the Dhamma and the practical texture of relationships: how couples face each other in disagreement, how Right Speech applies when one is tired or frustrated, and how to navigate the presence of parents-in-law with patience rather than resentment.
Couples left with something more specific than inspiration.
“We are more confident in navigating our differences and have practical tools to reduce the intensity of our disagreements,” wrote one participant. “The workshop also gave us time and space to have discussions with one another, which is a lot of quality time.”
Another wrote: “This course should be for all couples. It’s a good reminder that love is hard work and we always need to be working on it.”
A format that clicks
What struck many participants was not only the content, but the structure. Two days, one night, away from ordinary life. No work or errands. Just the two of you, and a community of couples doing the same work alongside you.
For many couples, uninterrupted time together is rarer than they realise. The retreat creates the conditions for conversations that keep getting postponed.
“Short and impactful, and I love the 2D1N format,” said one attendee.
The vegetarian meals received their own mention too: “P.s. the veg food was good!”
Who this is for
The retreat is open to couples who are married, engaged, or dating with the intention of building a long-term relationship. You do not need to be a seasoned Buddhist practitioner. Several participants last year described the retreat as the moment they began to see how the Dhamma applied to their closest relationship.
“It helped to open up my Dhamma experience and peek into Buddhism,” one participant noted.
If your relationship is in good shape, this is a place to deepen it. If you have been carrying frustrations you do not quite know how to name, it is a place to bring those too. The Dhamma does not ask us to pretend difficulties do not exist. It asks us to meet them with clarity and care.
18 and 19 July 2026, Singapore Yacht Club
The retreat runs again this July at Singapore Yacht Club. It is limited to 20 couples.
Register here:
https://www.sbm.sg/relationship-retreat
Join us for a weekend of connection, reflection and shared growth ❤️
The fee is $650 per couple and includes accommodation, full course materials, and all meals.To register, scan the QR code on the poster or contact Amy Tong at 9639 5085.
